When my schedule unexpectedly changed at the last minute this morning, I decided to go for one of my walks (especially since it’s rare these days that the sun is shining in Texas!). Along the way, I started thinking about why I was feeling angry at myself. The very clear reason was this: I’d yet again failed to learn a lesson the Universe had “taught” to me so many times.
I have many of these types of lessons, including:
- responding impulsively rather than considering the next best thing to say or do
- allowing my mind to run off to worst-case-scenarios instead of listening when a partner “needs to talk” (yet all the while, stressing the importance of good communication in a relationship!)
- failing to realize the energetic power I have to create and destroy
- failing to value my time and effort
- forgetting that one almost pain-free day still doesn’t mean I can do everything I used to (at least, not without next-day or even next-hour regret!)
- expecting people to act in a way I would want them to (e.g. be more considerate, competent, etc.)
- forgetting that slowing down, having patience and being compassionate is empowering
- that for me, good habits work when I consistently keep them as part of my routine or lifestyle (vs. allowing for “wiggle room” that inevitably turns into a full-on habit-breaker)
- failing to recognize that no matter how bleak or overwhelming things seem, I always have choices
- and so on….
When I call to mind the qualities of, or events in my life that I label as “unlikeable” or when I feel “done to”, what usually follows (eventually) is a deeper inner knowing that this negative association exists simply because I have failed to learn the lessons life has been trying to teach me. And until I can learn those lessons, the Universe will continue to intentionally place those qualities or events in front of me, like a bright red Stop sign.
I’m happy to report that although this morning taught me a lot of the same lessons, I did make some progress on a different lesson last night. So, there is hope that I won’t continue rolling through all the Stop signs of my life without fully depressing the brakes!
Thoughts? Am I the only one who gets beaten over the head?? Would love to hear from you.